today de me..

suddenly feel very moody.. at 1st didn wanna blog dy de la.. wait till tomolo after see firework wif shequ gang.. come back only post blog wif picture together.. well, thought can put a nice blog here instead of sounding sad.. but while studying for my ma midterm test.. i suddenly feel bad.. suddenly think of him.. someone that i thought i hav forgotten.. well, forgetting someone wasn that easy as i thought it would.. tomolo.. the eve of merdeka.. last year.. this day.. i went countdown wif him and he went to my home in kajang.. that was rather shocking actually.. then, we go hav satay before heading to sg wang where there is damn lots of people.. now think back.. so fast a year hav past.. and mooncake festival is coming soon.. well, still remember that he ask me on the day of the mooncake festival.. haha.. i thought he wanted to ask me to treat him as normal fren.. where thing turn out to b diff.. i am wondering if he didn ask me.. will i agree to b NS de gf?? haha.. everything is a risk and a road for u to choose.. i nvr regret taking the road tat i've choosen.. at least i've try wat i wan.. although the result is not something that i wan..
well, mayb listening to too much sad song.. dunno why sudd the radio play all the song that make me remind of him.. playing song that he told me he like and play me song that represent wat i am feeling.. well, i guess the god must b playing a fool wif me.. when i thought i finally manage to let go of him.. all his memory haunt me again.. =( the song "wo hen xiang ai ta".. the song "fong sang".. the song "tui ni you gan jue".. the song "hui you na me yi tien".. the song "zui jing".. the song "dai ko".. the song "liang san bo yu choo li yeh".. the song "mo lu".. the song "chuo le zai chuo".. the song "dang ni ku dan ni hui xiang qi shui".. and lots more.. i am tired of thinking but all the memory flashing back in my brain now.. where i cant even concentrate on my study..
there is once where i really hate "wei xiao" pasta.. i hate this movie.. and i even hate tung liang.. (all my life.. people think i love tung liang more than anything and because of him i can actually hate him).. this all because of the promises that he hav made but he didn fulfill it.. i hate people that promise but cant do it.. i hate it when he promise me that he will accompany me watch wei xiao pasta where at the end he didn do it.. i hate he say he will accompany me go watch tung liang de concert.. i hate it when he say he wanna bring me go beach.. i hate he didn even do one of the promise he had promise me.. it make me so miserable.. and i hate him even more when we were together he didn even think of mailing me but when we break he hav the time to mail me.. i.. i suddenly realise that i am nothing to him when we are together.. i am a jerk..
huh.. finally i hav voice out everything that i've keep long enough in my mind.. i dunno where and how should i express it.. i dunno how.. just dunno.. i know i will find someone better and i know i deserve someone better than him.. but.. that's wat i am feeling rite now.. well, writting it out really make me feel better.. i guess.. all this hav been in my heart for really long time.. really really long time...
mayb cause this weekend going to genting.. that's why it make me think of him.. (T.T)

because of the genting trip.. i was pretty unhappy and upset several time.. plan keep on changing and my expenses seem will b increasing also.. all i wish was to hav a great day in genting this weekend.. enjoying my time wif zk and wei ru, enjoying my time wif ling and tze yan, enjoying time wif princesses.. and enjoying my time wif my nicholas.. and finally enyoying my time wif others artists.. i just wan a nite that fill wif fun n joy instead of anger and phik chik.. can u guys help me??

well, for this trip.. i hav a cold fight wif my best fren, zk.. where i say i am sorry here ok.. i am sorrie zk.. u know my behaviour..

for this trip gotto thanks jiayi and also elyn figuring how to get accomodation for us..

for this trip also hav to thanks to jiayi's bf that fetch us all the way to tmn maluri where he is actually very very sleepy although at the end we didn get any ticket..

for this trip got to thanks akiko's sis that lead us to the office o..

for this trip, got to thanks aunty kelly for providing the entrance ticket for us..

for this trip.. i get myself in a trouble where i really hav to thanks aunty kelly, aunty geri, lailuan and ah teng for clearing everything in my mind.. =)

for this trip.. got to thanks wei ru for helping me find another few more extra ticket for weiru, zk, ling and also for zhiyen..
(well, i wish i could hav a great seat wif u guys at the vip zone.. but i wish i could spend some times wif the princesses.. they would understand my feeling more.. bet u guys would keep quiet when u guys see nic.. i wanted to hav fun and lost my voice.. so.. sorrie guys.. )

for this trip.. i pray hard to god that i would hav fun and not to angry and hav bad mood on that few days trip.. please... =)

p/s:.. if i hav left anyone name i am sorrie ya.. when i remember i will come back and write.. i promise.. =).. so NICHOLAS.. here i come lo.. to genting.. =)