goodbye..

last sat my grandma pass away le.. mixed feeling is all i hav i guess.. erm, sad sure got la.. i mean a lil shock as well.. we didn know grandma dead when we go.. once we step into my grandma's house.. all i see was she lying in the living room and covered wif my mum's handmade blanket.. i was shock man.. mummy cried straight.. we were scared actually.. didn know wat to do.. even my sis cry.. that was something really shcoking.. but i guess my sis feeling guilty not asking dad to go back earlier.. cause we miss the chance to see our grandma..
things got complicated and lots stuff we need to do.. tiring and all.. we hav lots of things to do and settle.. and days get more and more tired each days.. all the ceremony, ritual.. belief.. and everything.. i am like in the middle of shock i guess.. worse is to see my mum i guess.. how to comfort her and everything.. but she can handle it better than i think she is.. she didn cry as terible as i imagine and she did feel better.. mayb cause it was a relief for my grandma..
as for me.. i didn cry much.. though it was my 1st time attending funeral.. mayb cause i think the same.. it is a relief for my grandma.. but when i see grandfather, my tear start streaming near my eye.. i cannot tahan man.. erm, cause grandma dead.. then, left him alone and he hav to u know?? stay here alone?? and all they hav is daughter and all hav their own live.. every family hav their prob.. well, with one son, my granddad like no son.. so when see him.. tear coming cause he is going to be alone.. when i see him cry.. my heart got even more sour.. sad.. bless him i guess.. hope that he won stay alone and will travel stay wif all the daughter..
goodbye i guess.. i didn know what will happen in the future.. but i hope she will hav a release and hav a peaceful life..